Tuesday, November 13, 2012

When Are You Going to Die?

First, let me say that I am drugged so the quality of this writing will be abysmal. Second, let me say that I am drugged so....wait....duuuuude....I am so stoned....what is that alarm? (true story, an alarm went off right there lol).

I write this because it is really very taxing to give the same answers over and over to concerned individuals. I love you guys but talking bout this stuff is getting old. I know they care, but one can only speak of their own mortality so many times before depression, or desperation, kicks in.

Thursday, October 25, 2012

BrokeBack Writer

And you all thought I was coming out of the closet. Tsk, tsk.



Step on a crack, break an author's back. Which one of you was thinking of me while walking carelessly down the sidewalk?

Thursday, September 13, 2012

Random Thoughts (NSFW!!!!!)

Hellooooooo!  Anyone out there?  Hey, you!  In the back row.  I see you hiding there.  Leave a comment so I know people still check in here.

Bullet updates and random thoughts:

STILL struggling with book three.  Working on it but taking a break to post this.  The struggle?  Trying to write a woman and do her justice is tough.  Plus, I have been working 60 hours a week so even when I am home, I am recuperating more than writing.  Yeah, life sucks a bit but it's better than the alternative :).

Did the PA Ren Faire so that took up a weekend.  Looney Lucy and Ploppy are better than ever.  Don Juan and Miguel were ok.  Not much of a turnout there, kinda makes you wonder about the state of the economy.  Nevermind, no wondering needed.  Still sucks :).



Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Ask Tom Tuesday: Female Footwear Explained


Today's question is one that has perplexed men for ages: What is it with women and shoes?

Tom says:

Not every woman is obsessed with shoes, but it is usually a safe bet that she owns more pairs than the man in her life.

Men only need a few pairs of shoes and each has a specific function:

Thursday, June 21, 2012

"The Reluctant" and Big Al


I think I first became aware of Big Al's Books and Pals in March of 2011 when I was researching blogs to which I could peddle my first book. At that time, the story of the day was "The Greek Seaman"

Please, God, tell me I spelled that right...

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Ask Tom Tuesday: I Love You


Our question today comes from some woman that I got stuck with for two hours (long story). I don't know how the conversation turned to her love life...some people just over-share...but the issue is one with which we have all dealt at one point or another:

When is “I love you” appropriate?

Tom Says:

Sunday, June 3, 2012

C.S. Splitter IS Your...


People that know me know that I have, what I consider to be, a healthy semi-obsession with George R.R. Martin and his “A Song of Ice and Fire” series. Watching “Game of Thrones: on HBO? Martin is the guy who wrote the books on which the series is based. The first three books in the series are the best fantasy ever written.

Martin published those first three books in the space of about four years. Not a bad rate. Unfortunately, the fourth book took something like five years to publish and the fifth took another five (plus) years to get to print. His fans split over the delay and Martin's public relations machine went on an extended vacation as updates on progress were nearly non-existent.

His supporters proclaimed that “you cannot rush art!” His detractors opined that Martin had become lazy, distracted, and had possibly lost his magic touch. As the battle in fandom raged, Neil Gaiman came to his defense and famously told the detractors that “George R.R. Martin is not your bitch!”

Well, I am not George R.R. Martin and aside from the facts that he has sold many millions more books, is a better writer of prose, and is the creator of the world for HBO's flagship series these days, I feel obligated to give my readers, friends, and fans (my Happy Few), an update.

In short, C.S. Splitter IS your bitch.

Saturday, May 26, 2012

Cobwebs

*cough*

Woah - it looks like I might have had the wrong impression *sneeze* about Splitter all along.


I know that he claims he has a life outside of entertaining everyone who comes to this neck of the woods and all and I really didn’t believe that to be the case.  I lean more towards he is holed up in a cabin in the woods somewhere trying to reenact scenes from the epic Joss Whedon film, and figuring out if a cheese grater is the best way to dispose of a body or if he’s going to have to go all Fargo on us and use the wood chipper.

Friday, May 25, 2012

Memorial Day Weekend Only!

Hello everyone! Trish here! Since the Boss-man is working his fingers to the bone, I figured I'd hijack Splitter's blog to let you in on some great news! This weekend only, for the first time ever, The Willing is FREE!

Splitter posted this on Facebook just a few minutes ago:

More of an update on me later. For now, please enjoy a couple freebies for your weekend reading pleasure. On me, of course: http://www.amazon.com/The-Willing-Crayder-Chronicles-ebook/dp/B006AWYE2M/ref=tmm_kin_title_0?ie=UTF8&m=AG56TWVU5XWC2

That's right. For the first time ever, The Willing has charted on Amazon and sits at #66 in Action/Adventure Ebooks and, also for the first time, it is free to you.

Yeah, The Reluctant, the book that started it all, is free this weekend too:
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B004VS751O?ie=UTF8&force-full-site=1&ref=aw_bottom_links

Get both, my treat. And...SPREAD THE WORD to your interwebs virtual friends.

Splitter 


In addition to this great news, The Willing also hit #55 in the UK! So thanks to you who have who have already purchased both The Willing and The Reluctant! And to those of you who haven't, here's your perfect chance to get all caught up - free! - before the 3rd book comes out (later this year).

I will now return you to your regularly scheduled broadcasting.  :)

Wednesday, April 11, 2012

Ask Tom Tues--WEDNESDAY. (Yeah, Wednesday because I was too busy yesterday)


Today's question comes from me as I indulge in a bit of writer-navel-gazing. Writers need their characters to grow in some way, to change. Readers need it too and that's one of the reasons a character may or may not be interesting. So saying, I would note that the growth and/or change does not have to be for the better.

Were all of Bilbo's changes for the better? Is Jason Bourne all warm and cuddly now? How about Thelma and Louise? The journey is the interesting part of the change, not the outcome.

So I asked Tom Crayder: What have you learned during your two book journey thus far?

I hoped for some insight from my main character. He has, at times, shown a capacity for introspection. What I got was this.

Thursday, April 5, 2012

I'm Your Author in the Alley


As a midweek surprise today, I have a guest post by fellow/future author Frank Smith.

A little background: Frank and I met on an Internet discussion board. That is sort of the same way I met my wife but please do not confuse the two...Mrs. Splitter is better looking. He and I quickly found out that we were both of a minority opinion on that board and formed one of those new-fangled Internet friendships via that forum's private messaging system.

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Ask Tom Tuesday : Harry, Harry, Quite Contrary...


There seems to be a burning question out there among women and it has nothing to do with women. I have received several questions pertaining to one subject and all but one of the interested parties has requested to remain anonymous.

I am not sure why women do not want to be identified with their questions on male grooming and can only surmise that their husbands/boyfriends read this blog and the women do not want to start an argument with their significant others. This is in an age when every other television ad is about either E.D. (and if you know what that is, the advertising has been effective) or feminine hygiene (I have even seen these during football games!).

Maybe Tom can help the ladies get the results they want without damaging any egos.

Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Ask Tom Tuesday...er...Grrouchie


Today, while Tom is off doing whatever it is that he does (wink, wink), we are honored to welcome Grrouchie from Confessions of a Local Fish for a guest post.

And I am sorry to the sensitive...this is a VERY manly guest post and NOT for the faint of heart. You really might want to pass on this until that Egg McMuffin settles. Really, it made me heave a couple times and I write about people who find unusual ways to dispose of bodies.

Friday, March 23, 2012

Football Friday: Andrew Luck DOOMED


The Indianapolis Colts are expected to take Andrew Luck with the first pick in the upcoming NFL draft. This will go down in history as one of the biggest “misses” of all time because Luck is doomed to fail.

“Doomed” may be too strong a word. It might be more accurate to say that if he succeeds it will be miraculous.

His impending failure has nothing to do with his abilities as a quarterback. He had a stellar college career that showed him to be accurate and intelligent. For an NFL QB, he has great athleticism even though he does not possess the same gifts as Robert Griffin III, the player that is likely to be picked right after Luck. As a matter of fact, all reports I have seen say that Luck even has those elusive “intangibles” that make a great QB, which include a knack for winning and leadership.

So why am I saying that he is doomed to fail?

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Tom is BACK!


Tom just flew in from Vegas and, boy, are his arms tired.....

Today's topic comes from some Old Man over at Confessions of a Local Fish  (remember to feed the fish at the top of the page, it is somehow mesmerizing)

I am told that the question needs to be read in a thick New York accent to get the right vibe.

Saturday, March 17, 2012

Confessions of a Local Author

The BlogTour officially ended with Indie Supporter's interview with Mrs. Splitter.

BUT!  And this is a BIG but,I felt the need to do one more unofficial, unplugged, uncensored guest post and Grrouchie from Confessions of a Local Fish was kind enough to let me vent over there about....everything, but with special emphasis on Social Media.

I swear, Facebook and Twitter will be the downfall of us all.

If you have sensitive ears or can't stand a little rough language, skip this one.  However, I will say that Grrouchie added at least one pic of a babe with a killer Evil Black Rifle and a navel ring...not sure which I like more...

Splitter

Thursday, March 15, 2012

The End of the Official Tour

How could I end my tour anywhere else than with my PR Pimptress, Jenn from Indie Supporter .

HOWEVER, go take a look at that interview...it's not ME.  It comes from my wife.  That's right, Jenn bypassed me and went straight tot he power.

Thank you,
Splitter

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Tour Stop with Austin Powers and Tom Cruise

That headline got your attention, didn't it?  Go here to see why: Lila's Blog .


I swear....the funniest "Not-A Review" EVER!

Splitter

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

No Time for Tom and the Football Nerd Escapes


I must let my football nerd out once in a while or he starts to take too much control over my thoughts and I find myself dreaming about stretch plays, buzz coverages, and blitz pickups.

Yeah, I know, most of my regular readers just clicked away without reading the rest of this, but I cannot stop now…

The Washington Redskins have made a huge trade to acquire the second pick in the upcoming draft and they are expected to take Robert Griffin III out of Baylor. To move up to the second spot, they swapped first round picks with the Rams and also gave up their first round picks in the next two drafts plus their second round pick this season.

Today's BlogTour Stop with Tana

I am honored to be featured on Tana's blog today: Interview and Review .

How do women like Tom Crayder?  Find out there.

Splitter